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Emmi Lawrence

~ MM Fantasy Romance Writer

Emmi  Lawrence

Tag Archives: Erotica

Canvas Blues – XXXIII: Yesteryears

09 Wednesday Sep 2020

Posted by Emmi Lawrence in Contemporary, Fantasy, M/M, Serial

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Canvas Blues, Erotica, Fantasy, fantasy romance, Fiction, gay romance, LGBT, long-reads, Love, M/M, Mystery, Novel, prose, reading, Romance, Writing

CANVAS BLUES
Vignettes Regarding the Artwork of Brendon Kotes

XXXIII: Yesteryears

The Bayscape sat between a coffee shop and an herbal remedy shop, which meant it smelled about a dozen ways delicious. Peppermint accosted Brendon on two sides as he stared into the wide gallery windows, the edges frosted and the OPEN sign nothing but a wind chime made of letters that tingled and clanked against one another. Inside, no one moved, but canvas and pottery perched on wall space and squat white tables.

He pressed a hand against the window that first afternoon, fingers chilling through his gloves. A want had stirred deep in his gut that day Donna Pierceman had stood in front of the art tables in her flowing, flowery dress. A want that twisted his imagination into dreams that many from his neighborhood harbored in the recesses of their minds. Not of football though or of full-ride scholarships or California beaches or talent discoveries outside Manhattan.

The grip of shyness held him near that window for long minutes. Two streets over, the mechanical church bell sang and then donged four times to announce the hour, like Grandma Angel’s old grandfather clock times ten on the decibel scale.

Like magic, the bell woke Brendon from his ruminating and had him acting before his mind could catch up and second-guess for him. Continue reading →

Canvas Blues – XXXII: Present

02 Wednesday Sep 2020

Posted by Emmi Lawrence in Contemporary, Fantasy, M/M, Serial

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Canvas Blues, Erotica, Fantasy, fantasy romance, Fiction, gay romance, LGBT, long-reads, Love, M/M, Mystery, Novel, prose, reading, Romance, Writing

CANVAS BLUES
Vignettes Regarding the Artwork of Brendon Kotes

XXXII: Present

Jennifer Craugh walked them out and stood on her doorstep to watch them leave. Her head remained cocked as if she attempted to solve the question of what Orion Livesey had truly wanted. Brendon stared at her in the side mirror as Orion pulled away, out into the summer morning and through the young neighborhood with its just-planted trees and too many roses.

“She’s been in those woods,” said Orion.

“You can’t be sure. Not when you frame your questions about dreams.”

“You can’t be sure. I can.”

Brendon shot him an annoyed glare, but Orion didn’t react.

“Aren’t you worried those wolves might tear her apart?” Continue reading →

Canvas Blues – XXXI: Yesteryears

26 Wednesday Aug 2020

Posted by Emmi Lawrence in Contemporary, Fantasy, M/M, Serial

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Canvas Blues, Erotica, Fantasy, fantasy romance, Fiction, gay romance, LGBT, long-reads, Love, M/M, Mystery, Novel, prose, reading, Romance, Writing

CANVAS BLUES
Vignettes Regarding the Artwork of Brendon Kotes

XXXI: Yesteryears

Brendon met Donna Pierceman through Mr. Wexler, his art teacher bringing her in one afternoon to speak to all his students. Donna wore a flowery dress that flowed and flowed about her curves as she nervously shifted during her presentation. Her hair—brown and bunned—wisped around her face in escaping curls. Her eyes held the same critical estimation as Mr. Wexlar’s and Aunt Laurel’s.

“The Bayscape focuses on local artists. We feature collections occasionally, but more often than not we do themed displays. We also have a section for students, from elementary to college, to give young men and women, such as yourselves, a chance to showcase your own work.”

Brendon didn’t raise his hands during the question and answer section at the end. Instead, he sat through fifteen minutes of Dylan asking things like, “What if you break a piece of art?” and “What if you hate what someone’s designed?” and “So anyone can put pieces on display in your gallery?”

“Not anyone. We expect quality, but we want to help motivate young artists who are stepping into the field.” Donna cocked her head in a such a manner that made Brendon think Dylan would never have anything on display inside The Bayscape.

After, Brendon lingered, fingers working over the straps of his book bag. Donna didn’t notice, a lot of her nervous bravado sluicing off her back as she checked her phone in a spare moment of relaxation. But Mr. Wexlar did. Continue reading →

Canvas Blues – XXX: Yesteryears

19 Wednesday Aug 2020

Posted by Emmi Lawrence in Contemporary, Fantasy, M/M, Serial

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Canvas Blues, Erotica, Fantasy, fantasy romance, Fiction, gay romance, LGBT, long-reads, Love, M/M, Mystery, Novel, prose, reading, Romance, Writing

CANVAS BLUES
Vignettes Regarding the Artwork of Brendon Kotes

XXX: Yesteryears

Tori Kel didn’t happen all at once, these things never do. Robbie looked first, furtive glances, shy smiles, quiet conversations after classes that Brendon shared with him but Casey didn’t. So Brendon got to see Tori Kel bend down and hand a dropped pencil back to Robbie and say, “Like your Batman folder, man.”

And Brendon got to see Robbie huff and fumble over his words even though those words were only, “Thank you.”

Because Brendon shared that English class, he also got to see Robbie linger at his desk every day, puttering when he should have been packing up. Got to see Robbie smile and bravely say “Hi,” one morning and, “Did you do the homework?” another.

Got to see Robbie swallow, broken voice uneven as puberty had snuck up on them all, and lean forward like he wanted to go ask Tori Kel whether she wanted to go to the dance together on Friday. That was Monday. Tuesday, Robbie breached that ocean of distance and asked, but Brendon wasn’t there to see.

Casey’s response didn’t happen all at once either.

Denial made him cranky and at first, Brendon thought, there went that rubber band again, springing Casey away from Robbie through whatever argument they’d had.

He’d say things like, “She won’t last,” and “She’s not even pretty,” and “You don’t think she’s pretty, right, Bren?”

And Brendon would nod along, because he agreed, Tori Kel wasn’t the sort of person he thought about at night. Plus Casey liked that answer and would give an approving nod and sidle closer with conspiratorial murmurs, the smell of him overwhelming Brendon’s world for those few precious moments.

~~~~~~~~~

Next Chapter: XXXI

Canvas Blues – XXIX: Present

12 Wednesday Aug 2020

Posted by Emmi Lawrence in Contemporary, Fantasy, M/M, Serial

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Canvas Blues, Erotica, Fantasy, fantasy romance, Fiction, gay romance, LGBT, long-reads, Love, M/M, Mystery, Novel, prose, Romance, Short Fiction, Writing

CANVAS BLUES
Vignettes Regarding the Artwork of Brendon Kotes

XXIX: Present

The painting Jennifer Craugh had bought had been done in shades of gray and green with hints of maroon and purple if one knew where to look. A wolf pack in the mist that Brendon had entitled Come From Wisps on account of the glows he’d embedded in the depths of the forest to give the painting better contrast. A mysterious piece, of a world that might exist anywhere. Or nowhere.

Jennifer Craugh, on the other hand, had not a mysterious bone in her body. Bright blonde hair, skin the color of an alabaster statue, eyes blue as the summer sky and manner open, honest, and welcoming.

“Brendon?” Her surprise melted away into warmth. “How are you?”

They exchanged pleasantries, Brendon with some reservations, in Jennifer’s entryway, down her hall, and into her living space. Orion seemed right at home, his voice a constant companion as he responded to Jennifer’s inquires and turned them back around fluidly.

“You’re here to see the painting?”

“A professional curiosity. My client is considering sponsoring Brendon and tasked me to check the durability and satisfaction of some of his sales.”

Jennifer cast a glance over her shoulder, but there existed no suspicion in her gaze. “Your client couldn’t go wrong with a Kotes painting.” She winked at Brendon. “You can tell him satisfaction is a high in this customer.”

“I most certainly will tell her that,” Orion corrected fluidly, stepping around Jennifer and up to the painting, leaving nothing but the smell of his aftershave—sandalwood and iron, though the iron might have been fancy on Brendon’s part. “This is incredible. Such detail in the brush strokes, every hair on the beast’s body. How many colors did you use on these creatures?” Continue reading →

Canvas Blues – XXVIII: Yesteryears

05 Wednesday Aug 2020

Posted by Emmi Lawrence in Contemporary, Fantasy, M/M, Serial

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Canvas Blues, Erotica, Fantasy, fantasy romance, Fiction, gay romance, LGBT, long-reads, Love, M/M, Mystery, Novel, prose, Romance, Short Fiction, Writing

CANVAS BLUES
Vignettes Regarding the Artwork of Brendon Kotes

XXVIII: Yesteryears

Girls at the races during humid autumn nights wore skimpy shorts and loose, flowy tops. They wore hair down, letting it fly and whip when the cars zipped past. Some of them would disappear into backs of cars and come out clothes askew.

Brendon had never noticed before what all those girls did. Not even Casey’s sister remained on his mind after she’d inevitably vanish with friends or soon-to-be-friends who had something powdery or smoky to offer. But he couldn’t help but notice when that seemed to be all Robbie saw, eyes wide in a combination of fright and aspirations.

Couldn’t help noticing because Casey noticed and ragged on Robbie mercilessly. Brendon had multiple sketches of Robbie’s face from that night and a few after, and every one caught the brightness in Robbie’s eyes, the rampant confused desire burning out from within. And Casey looking on, a similar desire unhidden, yet somehow gone missed, right there to be read by anyone who knew the language.

Lewd jokes rippled through their tiny friend group. Continue reading →

Canvas Blues – XXVII: Yesteryears

29 Wednesday Jul 2020

Posted by Emmi Lawrence in Contemporary, Fantasy, M/M, Serial

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Canvas Blues, Erotica, Fantasy, fantasy romance, Fiction, gay romance, LGBT, long-reads, Love, M/M, Mystery, Novel, paranormal, prose, Romance, Short Fiction, Writing

CANVAS BLUES
Vignettes Regarding the Artwork of Brendon Kotes

XXVII: Yesteryears

Brendon had long replaced the sketches of Casey when the tapping came on his window. He woke sluggishly to a pale face outside, a face full of promise. Casey’s whisper through the screen a few moments later came fast and breathless.

“There’s a night tonight. Big Man Skiv and Taylor L. are going to tear up the street. Becks has a cooler full of beer and a hankering not to go alone. Come on.”

And that night, a cool September twenty-eighth, only five months before Tori Kel smiled and said yes to Robbie, was the first night the boys snuck to the track all together. Not the first night for Casey, not by a long shot. Not even the first time Casey had dragged Brendon, but the first time Robbie—straight-laced Robbie and his worried eyes—finally gave in and slipped his bedroom window and snuck through the fence to join them. Blame an argument with his father for that one.

They piled into Becky’s car, glitter shining on her eyelids and a familiar scent, that Brendon did not identify as weed until later, ghosting about the interior. She had a low voice, but a high laugh as she went roaring through the neighborhood, the engine yowling like a cat in heat (Casey’s words) and the moon like a fingernail hanging onto the sky for dear life. Continue reading →

Canvas Blues – XXVI: Present

22 Wednesday Jul 2020

Posted by Emmi Lawrence in Contemporary, Fantasy, M/M, Serial

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Canvas Blues, Erotica, Fantasy, fantasy romance, Fiction, gay romance, LGBT, long-reads, Love, M/M, Mystery, Novel, prose, Romance, Short Fiction, Writing

CANVAS BLUES
Vignettes Regarding the Artwork of Brendon Kotes

XXVI: Present

They started locally, which wasn’t difficult as many of Brendon’s original sales had come from studio exhibitions. He sat in Orion’s passenger seat, conscious that the BMW cost a great deal more than Brendon tended to make in an average year. The leather seats stuck to his arms despite the air conditioning and Orion had paused the audio book he’d been listening to out of politeness sake.

“Thriller?” asked Brendon, randomly running a finger along his side of the center console.

“Non-fiction.”

“That sounds like you,” murmured Brendon.

Orion laughed. A quiet sound, but deep, deep in his chest, a rumbling that Brendon felt all the way to his bones. He clutched at the sketchbook in his lap. Orion had stared at the crumpled spiral-bound and graphite-smudged book, but hadn’t said a word.

“Am I so easy to read?” asked Orion.

“No,” murmured Brendon. “But when things fit, they fit.”

“And how does that…fit…with me?” Continue reading →

Canvas Blues – XXV: Yesteryears

15 Wednesday Jul 2020

Posted by Emmi Lawrence in Contemporary, Fantasy, M/M, Serial

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Canvas Blues, Erotica, Fantasy, fantasy romance, Fiction, gay romance, LGBT, long-reads, Love, M/M, Mystery, Novel, prose, Romance, Short Fiction, Writing

CANVAS BLUES
Vignettes Regarding the Artwork of Brendon Kotes

XXV: Yesteryears

The first time Brendon woke choking on an orgasm, he lay shivering in bed, limbs a twitching, Casey’s laughter ringing in his ears, Casey’s scent lingering in his nostrils. He’d sweat through his pants and his sheets clung to his skin despite the autumn gentleness. Outside, the moon had risen, bright and almost whole, as if it had delivered Brendon the sweetest of dreams on a ray of pale light.

He did not move, too confused. The mind, he discovered later, did not work as well in the midnight hours, but right then, he found in himself a growing terror that he could not put name to. This welling feeling—both physical and emotional—that stirred in his belly and took claim to his mind.

In a spattering of nights after, months and years, Brendon would wake at odd hours, Casey’s name a moan on his lips. He found himself comfortable with the idea of holding his friend, of kissing him, of sharing intimacy that one couldn’t do with superheroes who did not exist. Continue reading →

Canvas Blues – XXIV: Yesteryears

08 Wednesday Jul 2020

Posted by Emmi Lawrence in Contemporary, Fantasy, M/M, Serial

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Canvas Blues, Erotica, Fantasy, fantasy romance, Fiction, gay romance, LGBT, long-reads, Love, M/M, Mystery, Novel, prose, Romance, Short Fiction, Writing

CANVAS BLUES
Vignettes Regarding the Artwork of Brendon Kotes

XXIV: Yesteryears

Why did all the boys ask for pictures, yet the girls did not? The question Mr. Wexlar had posed niggled far more solidly in Brendon’s mind than it had any right to and yet he could not shake it.

Like a bug, the question buzzed obnoxiously, so Brendon found himself drawing swarms of mosquitoes and gnats and no-see-ums, propping them on fields of tufted grass and cattails. He even presented one to Mr. Wexlar one day as a present, who looked down on it with those critical eyes and said, “Why Brendon, this is one of the best works I’ve seen from you. See here, the way you’ve given the wind character and the sunlight presence, and here, the color changes so vividly, like a flash as you’re walking by. Gorgeous. Keep this up.”

It was the first gushing praise Brendon ever received from Mr. Wexlar. And it didn’t come again for months and then only in the presence of Donna Pierceman.

Mr. Wexlar attempted to convince Brendon to submit the piece as part of his end-of-quarter portfolio, but guilt-ridden, he insisted it was a gift and that he had others in mind to complete, but that he would take the praise in stride and maybe do a few more as practice.

The insects he painted for his portfolio ended up being dragonflies on abandoned radio antennas riddling an overgrown patch around a deflated plastic pool. Mr. Wexlar liked that one too. Maybe he just liked bugs.

~~~~~~~~~

Next Chapter!

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CANVAS BLUES
Vignettes Regarding the Artwork of Brendon Kotes

A serialized novel begun Jan 29th 2020. Here you can find links to the beginning and the most recent additions.

I: Prologue
II: Present
III: Yesteryears
IV: Yesteryears
V: Present

……….

L: Present
LI: Yesteryears
LII: Yesteryears
LIII: Present
LIV: Yesteryears

New chapters published every Wednesday!
Next up: Jul 7th 2021

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THE BAYWATER & THE HURRICANE
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WHAT SECRETS MIGHT REMAIN
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TALL, DARK & HANDSOME
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THE IMMORTAL LOVER OF LAKE PHANTA
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ACROSS THAT OCEAN OF SAND
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MY LIFE, HIS BREATH
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POET’S BANE
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  • Canvas Blues – XCV: Present
  • Canvas Blues – XCIV: Present
  • Coffee & Conversation: How to keep your plots/stories from being repetitive?
  • Canvas Blues – XCIII: Yesteryears
  • Coffee & Conversation: How to critique someone else’s work?
  • Canvas Blues – XCII: Present

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